Tag Archives: weather

>Li’l Knight

>I’m having trouble these mornings getting up. Mostly during the week. Read into that what you will.

I commute for about 40 minutes to an hour, and 25 minutes of that is walking. Which isn’t a bad commute, really.

This morning it was making me grumpy though. Doesn’t matter if the journey is tolerable if you aren’t happy with the destination. On top of that there were no seats, the weather was bleak and I hadn’t had any coffee. A recipe for the grumpies, really.

So in a sour mood I got off the train at London Bridge. And on the platform was a little boy wearing a plastic knight’s helmet and scowling even more than I was. Which made me smile big – I nearly laughed. Just the ridiculousness of the helmet, the facial expression and the location: Perfect. I loved him in that moment… he was made of pure awesomeness, the impetuous little bugger.

And after seeing the li’l knight… the sky didn’t seem so dour and suddenly I could wait for coffee. And despite things not being great in all aspects of my life right now (read: work, boys, money, etc), I really need to remember that if the sight of a kid in a helmet is enough to pull me out of my morning slump… life ain’t that bad, kiddo. Life ain’t that bad.

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>Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow

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So, London got hit with the worst snowfall they’ve seen ’round these here parts in 18 years. Pretty exciting! The transportation system, whether underground or above it, is nearly completely disabled. We went to grab some food at a local grocers this morning and it was packed with people as though supplies may actually run low.


Yet for all the disruption, the snow is very beautiful and it is the most snow I’ve seen since Christmas 2004. I’ll be posting pictures on Flickr soon.

>Can we sit outside?

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Do you guys remember when you were still in elementary (and occasionally, if your teacher was a pot smoker, in high school) when you could convince your teacher to let the class do the reading lesson outside in the soccer field if the weather was nice?

That’s what it has been like here for the last few days. The weather is gorgeous! It is crying for me to go outside and play. If I was teaching, I would have the wee monkeys up on the roof for some free time for sure. Instead, I’m trapped inside making revision after revision for a presentation that the rest of the office won’t even mention to me as it causes my tic to act up.

I’m back to wondering what my purpose in life is. I hope to the powers that be that it isn’t to sit at my desk and create documents that mean nothing in the overall scheme of things.

>Fun times on Hooker Hill

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I’m not going to save any money (or my liver) if I keep this shite up. Seriously.

Friday

At least I didn’t swear that I wouldn’t go out Friday. Because that would have been a lie. Went to Joe and Orla’s place, had some beers, and headed to the Beer Cabin. It’s a friendly little place with this weird mural of an old dude sitting on a porch of his cabin in the woods (in his socks), holding a Cass Beer and miming that he is shooting a gun. A white dude. I DON’T KNOW WHY. But it was fun, with a lot of good conversation and a whole load of beers. All-in-all, a good night. Most excitedly, we found out on Friday night that there is a Subway coming a block away from the school. WHOOHOO!

::SIDE NOTE::

Orla, this one is for you, as per Merriam-Webster:

One entry found for bestiality.

Main Entry: bes·ti·al·i·ty
Pronunciation: "bes-chE-'a-l&-tE, "besh-, "bEs-, "bEsh-
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -ties
1 : the condition or status of a lower animal
2 : display or gratification of bestial traits or impulses
3 : sexual relations between a human being and a lower animal

::END SIDE NOTE::

Saturday

Headed into Seoul in the AM (but not TOO AM, if you get what I mean) to do some shopping and endure some self-inflicted pain with Andy. We went to the Coex first to have a bikini wax done. Although I have had this done many times in Canada, I was nervous about having it done in Korea, as Koreans in general don’t have much hair. So what the hell do they know about removing it?? It wasn’t really any better or worse. It’s a beautiful, universal fact: having hairs ripped out by the root from your pubic area is god-damned uncomfortable no matter where in the world you might dwell. Ouch!

After that, we headed over to the Technomart (didn’t I say it was dangerous that I was brought there in the first place?!? Didn’t I?) so I could get my Nano. And wouldn’t you know… the 4GB black ones were all sold out! Fuckerpants! Looks like Colin will get his before me. But, you know what a trooper I am… I ordered mine online to be shipped to my moms. Who can send it to me. Hooray! This way I could have them engrave “i caught you a delicious bass” on the back for free. If you don’t know what that refers to, you probably didn’t watch the funniest movie to come out in years enough times. Go watch it again.

In order to make up for not spending too much on an Apple product, I bought some more movies and socks. Not Techno-socks, but they are still cool. Then to Itaewon, where we ran into Orla (small country, you know) and went to Hanan Market. Got more dill pickles. Yummy!

::SIDE NOTE::

Regarding the weather this week: It is fucking cold.

::END SIDE NOTE::

After jaunting home for a quick change of clothes, we headed out for (another) night on the town. Long story made short: the girls and boys were each having their own night out. The boys were supposed to be going… somewhere, but the plan fell through. So, they ended up going to Itaewon, same as the girls. But they weren’t allowed (nor did they want to) come with us. They were probably 2 buses behind us. Crazy. Anyhoo, the girls all went to The Hollywood Grill, had some pitchers, then headed up Hooker Hill.

Yes, moms. Hooker Hill.

Andy kept telling us about a bar up there called “Polly’s Kettle” that was supposed to be good times. After ascertaining that she was, in fact, serious about dragging us up Hooker Hill, we relented and went with (I make it sound like she twisted our arms. We were on our way to drunk already by this point. The conversation probably went like this: “We could go to Polly’s Kettle on Hooker Hill…” “Okay.”) It was just a bar, but we had tons of fun dancing and drinking beers. While we were on our way up, we said that we would have to slaughter the boys if we caught them on Hooker Hill. They showed up in Polly’s Kettle not too long after us. Stupid boys. They didn’t stay as long as we did (they weren’t busy shaking it on the dance floor). After it got super-late, we headed back to Hollywood Grill, drank some more beers. Then ate some chicken skewers and headed home.

Sunday

Recovery.

::SIDE NOTE::

Honestly, after Friday and Saturday, what the hell did you think I was going to do Sunday??

::END SIDE NOTE::

Multiple France vs. the bidet


I swear I have permission from Frances to tell the funniest story I have heard in a long time. PERMISSION TO TELL THE WORLD. I’m giggling right now… this is something that doesn’t happen to people you know. Unless you know Frances.

Tonight Frances and I skipped the gym and headed to Lotte Mart. We concurred that our first order of business was to stop and use the toilets. Frances mentioned that the bathrooms there were nice (trust me, not all the bathrooms in Korea are nice, so this is a big deal. Some of them are bad enough that I would rather pee my pants. No, really.) and I asked if she had been to the ones in the new E-Mart. She had.

You need to know that the toilets in the E-Mart are equipped with bidets. Now, I’ve never used one before coming to Korea either, and it was slightly intimidating, because the damned thing is in Korean. But, I gave it a try because… well, there are some things you should try before you die. Having water squirted on my bum in the supermarket bathroom was apparently on my list of things to try. Try to picture the control panel for this bidet: there are about six buttons on this wee box attached to the side of the toilet, and it is all in Korean. Frances didn’t realize that it was a control panel for a bidet. She thought it was how you flushed the toilet.

Before you can start laughing (I am), this gets better. Because Frances was already standing up when she tried the buttons. (Now I really am laughing). She pushed one, and it didn’t seem to do anything. So she pushed another one, and she says “this weird little nozzle poked out from under the rim”. So Frances leaned in closer to see what it was.

Okay, wait a minute… I have to get control of myself.

Okay, I’m okay… nope.

Okay. I’m okay. I can finish this without laughing now…

So of course the damned thing starts spraying water (cold water, she tells me) and Frances panics. She backs up and the water pressure is good enough that it was hitting the stall door. She was crammed into the wrong corner, and got hit again when she had to unlock the door to escape. Then, of course, you now have to picture the toilet spraying water right out of the bathroom stall and hitting the opposite wall.

Oh no… here I go again. I gave myself the giggles.

I’m okay.

Poor Frances! She finally escaped the bidet and had to try and dry herself off using the hand drier. At the supermarket.

Oh Frances: thank you so much for this story! I will treasure it forever…

I should check the weather report before I start laughin’

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Well, so all of you back home can have a chuckle, it snowed here last night! It was very beautiful and a little surreal. I wasn’t expecting snow, so I was busy laughing at the Vancouverites (can’t believe you guys got snow either) and that night… snow. There was even some on the ground today. Crazy! This means I won’t take a bus anywhere until it is gone. Those crazy fuckers drive the buses at 140km on the freeway. I have no desire (today) to be a statistic.

Had a great weekend. On Friday a bunch of us went over to Orla and Joe’s place for some poker – Texas Hold ‘Em style. It was grand… I didn’t actually win, but I stayed in a few of the games right until the end which is better than I thought I would do. I was expecting to do so badly that I brought my Gameboy with me so I wouldn’t get bored. It was also fun because we played with Korean money… the buy-in was 3000 and we played with 100 coins. 3000 won is $3, just so you know. But it was still fun to say “I see your five hundred and raise you a grand.” Don’t think I’ll be saying that in Vegas anytime soon!

On Saturday I was back at Orla and Joe’s for dinner. They seemed to think that they “owed me one” for buying them beans (long story). If there is ever a “Best Host” contest, I’m voting for Orla and Joe. They always have food and booze and are willing to have us all over at their place all the time. Hooray! And dinner was very tasty. Much better than the rice and seaweed I was planning on having. While I was there we noticed the snow. It was pretty cool to walk home in it.

Today was super quiet, got my Xmas packages together and cleaned up the joint. Can’t believe how messy such a tiny place can be! I was glad to have a down-time day, I feel more ready to take on the monkeys tomorrow. Only a few more weeks until Thailand!

You ARE just saying that to scare me… right?

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Here is today’s rumour amongst the kids – that there is a typhoon hitting the west coast of Korea (yup Moms, I’m on the west coast) tomorrow. I don’t know if it is bullshit or not. Apparently China is getting really bad weather, and it was windy as a mother-effer here today (although, not as windy as it gets in Kamloops) (although there aren’t as many buildings in Kamloops to block the wind as there is here). For now I will bring my umbrella tomorrow and let you all know. Hopefully it is really bad and the power goes out and we can all go home. Hopefully the power does not go out while I am at physio and I get trapped in the Coffin of Sand. What a lame and ironic way to die.

Speaking of the Coffin, I’m still going to physio, and will talk to the doctor this Saturday. Also, I will be getting more xrays that day so hopefully I can do a full update. My back is sore today, but I blame Andrea and her bloody Tae-Bo that we did yesterday. I HATE Billy Banks. Ass. This last time we did it, we started talking back to the video. Billy (if you don’t know, he is the retard that leads on the video) (if you don’t know what Tae-Bo is: good on you)… anyway, Billy says “Okay, so when you do squats your stomach should be connected to your knees”, and Frances says “What the hell… my STOMACH should be connected to my KNEES?!?” (She hates him too, I think). I pipe up and remind her that Billy Banks is an ACTOR not a DOCTOR. It is fun because we all suck and all hate him and laugh a lot.

I bought a fish today. I figure if there is to be a typhoon, I may get trapped in my apartment and need an alternative water source (I’m always thinking, Moms). So now I have the fish bowl of water. I named him 참치 which is “Chamchi” or “Tuna” for you English-speaking folks. He likes me. He is blue. His rocks are yellow. I thought I killed Chamchi on the way home (too much wiggling) because he wouldn’t get the hell up off the bottom of his cup. But now he is in my bowl-of-alternative-water-source-in-case-of-typhoon and swimming his wee fish ass off. Go Chamchi!

Julie emailed today and brought up a good point. She said that I have mentioned drinking (a lot) of Korean beer, but not if it is good or not. Thank you, Jules. Excellent question. It is pretty good. Not great, but pretty good. On par with a Molson, Coors, etc. And for $2 a pint, after 6 or 7 you do.not.care. what the hell the effing beer tastes like. JUST BRING ME MORE BEER FOR TWO DOLLARS. DO EET. I still haven’t tried pure Soju, but I will let you know what that is like when I taste it (if it doesn’t kill me).

The water-fixer-guy is coming tomorrow. At 7:00am. Assholes. That is what I wanted to do in the middle of the week on the longest possible day (work until 7:30pm) – get up EVEN EARLIER. Rock on.


Original Comments:

Erin wrote (on 07/09/05):
  1. Yes there’s a typhoon coming
  2. School might be cancelled (mine never is)
  3. Don’t climb on your roof during the typhoon to fix an errant roof tile and don’t bother trying to catch the train home because they won’t be running
  4. Have a beer and listen to the rain

Ah, Korea… you muggy monkey armpit

Well, I have arrived in Korea and all is well. Andrea wanted me to email with my first impression of Korea… but I thought I would post it here so everyone can read it. Have you ever gone to have a shower immediately after someone else just showered, and they took the HOTTEST shower on the planet? That muggy-ass bathroom is what it felt like when I stepped out of the airport. Muggy, muggy, muggy. My clothes were soaked before I could even start sweating. Good thing everywhere has air conditioning.

The drive from the airport to the school was pretty dull, actually. We sort of skirted around Seoul as we drove from Incheon to Suji. The traffic was a bitch – it took 2 hours to make the drive. Lame. I was crashing hard, and trying to stay awake to look around at the same time. I was taken to the school first, and the Director and administrators took me out for dinner. We had Vietnamese food. Seriously. How weird. It’s a new restaurant in the area though and apparently they really dig it. Then they took me to my temp apartment. The one I will get is not vacated yet. The one I have right now is huge, but I don’t get to keep it. The next one will be a shoe box. Don’t worry, as soon as I have my computer hooked up to the internet I will get you guys some pictures to laugh at. The one I am in now is not furnished. There is nothing (no chairs, no fridge, no stove no a/c…. nothing) but my “bed” (which is a roll-away cot). The bed is approximately as comfortable as sleeping on a comforter you’ve thrown on the floor. Not even a foamy mind you… just a blanket. Hard as a freaking rock.

Mike, you asked me to take pictures of funny signs and stuff. I don’t have a picture for you yet, but I do live next door to “Pizza Cok”. I grabbed dinner from there last night, and Pizza Cok makes good pizza. I had to take a picture of what my $12 bought… the pizza box was wrapped in a red ribbon and there was a 100\ coin taped to the box. I also got a Coke, two little things of pickles (not good pickles like my mom’s, but sweet pickles), hot sauce and parmesan cheese. I got a small “potato pizza”. They have normal pizza, but I was told the potato pizza was good so I thought I would try it. Just what it sounds like, boys and girls – pizza with a hunk of potato on each piece. And it is GOOD.

Lies about Korea: That there is no chocolate or coffee (there is both, thank god)

Funniest thing found in Korea (other than Pizza Cok): Hello Kitty tampons. At the corner store.

Right now the coolest thing is that the people at the school (bosses and co-workers) seem really cool and very nice. The school is also very nice and well-equipped (and the a/c is on – hooray!) . The kids are amazing – very cute, very smart (smarter than me, at least) and really cuddly. I think it is going to be a lot of fun.

As soon as I get pictures uploaded (like the one of the Batman Bar – sweet!) I will post them for your viewin’ pleasure. Hopefully I’ll get to do that as soon as I am out of the temporary apartment.

Original Comments:

Erin wrote (on 20/08/05):

 

Don’t worry my dear, it’s equally nasty in Japan. I’ve now learned that fans are not and affectation they are a nessessity! It’s odd dreading summer but I promise that Aug is the worst… fall is fantastic! Promise. Oh and 歓迎 to Asia! it’s nice to have you here!