Delaffe Schizandra

There’s a title I couldn’t have just pulled out of me arse if I tried. No, no. That was the name of the… juice? We’ll call it juice. The name of the juice I just drank.


Delaffe is definitely the name of the brand, and therefore “schizandra” must be the flavour. And there are berries on the package, so perhaps “schizandra” is a type of berry.

“If only there was a way to find out,” she thought while typing a blog post on the fucking internet.

Be right back.

Thank you, Internet. It is definitely a berry and apparently really good for you.

Whatever. It still sounds like you are saying shits-andra when you say it out loud and I probably should have thought that through before, you know, buying it.

I bought a few of these pouch drinks. This shits-andra one, a cappuccino one, and a “blue lemonade” one. This one I obviously bought because I had NO idea what it would be like. I should probably stop food shopping with that as my criteria for purchase: WHAT ON EARTH COULD THIS BE? BETTER PUT IT IN THE FUCKING BASKET.

I like these drink pouches. It seems a lot less wasteful than buying bottles or cans of stuff. Not super convenient for travel (there’s no teasing straw-bending “hole” like Capri Sun throws in your face), but it’s good for at home. Light weight and less waste. You go, pouch drinks.

The drink was oranger than I was expecting. And it sort of tasted like cranberries, but without that weird other taste that cranberries have. Cranberry juice is sick, this isn’t. It was just some berry juice of juicy berriness. Hard to describe it any better than that. I suck.

I would probably buy it again, and I will definitely hunt down the Korean tea (omija cha) that is made with the same berries.


PS: How much bevvie does that pouch hold? That wee glass and a sip and a half. Not loads, but an actual serving size. Not bad.

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