Obsessive Compulsive Predicament

Although generally my obsessiveness with certain… perfections… can be helpful, there are times I worry that I go to far.

I have been doing a detox for the month of February. And now, on the last day… I’m so glad this month is over. Because although I have been eating well, the extremely strict rules I’ve subjected myself to means that I haven’t been enjoying much of a social life these days.

Have I mentioned the rules? My rules? The rules I’ve put on myself like a bully? No? Well, here they are:

1. No booze.
2. No wheat.
3. No gluten.
4. No coffee.
5. No sugar.
6. No preservatives.
7. No dairy.
8. No fruit.
9. No artificial sweeteners.
10. No legumes.

So what have I been ingesting? Mostly meat and vegetables. And it has been wonderful. I’ve had fresh scallops pan fried in purified butter with farmer’s bacon, roasted oak-smoked garlic and freshly cut cilantro. I’ve had bunless burgers with home-made guacamole and salsa served with sweet potato fries dipped in chipotle mayonnaise. Sounds great, doesn’t it?

But that was here, in my house. Where I can control each and every ingredient. You know where you can’t do that? Everywhere else. So I haven’t been eating in restaurants. The lack of alcohol (or really, any alternative drinks one would normally have in a pub, like Diet Coke or juice) means that I’m not really into going out for drinks. So I haven’t been out much.

The upside is that I’ve saved enough money doing this that I was able to buy two pairs of new shoes. Mmmm…. new shoes.

So what’s the issue? I’m obsessive about details.

This means I haven’t slipped. Not once. For the entire month. I couldn’t relax about it. Even the fact that I wouldn’t go out and risk accidentally eating something on my “No no, bad Jodi” list is sort of wrong. Don’t you think?

Not weird enough? How about the fact that I’ve been dreaming about breaking the rules? Obsessive.

Now that I’m  the end of the month, I’m not going to go back to my old way of eating. Because that would also be stupid… it’s how I got to be a chubbo in the first place. But I do need to relax a bit or I’m going to drive myself insane.

When I wasn’t eating well at all (helllOOOOooo pizza and beer), it didn’t matter if once (or even twice) a week I ate a good, healthy meal. I still packed on the weight.  What I need to remember  now is that the opposite also holds true:  If I am eating well most of the time, it won’t matter if I eat something unhealthy once (or even twice) a week… I’m not going to suddenly get fat(ter) again.

So what was the result of this bloody experiment? I dropped some weight and some inches… but I think that would have happened anyway. And I don’t have any additional energy – less in fact as I’ve been too restrictive on the calorie intake. A positive take-away is that I don’t seem to have any sensitivities to any of the foods I restricted. YAY COFFEE!

I’m glad it is over and that I can go back to eating in a less restricted but healthy way. I certainly won’t do it again. My personality just doesn’t allow for it.

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One response to “Obsessive Compulsive Predicament

  1. jodes, i can so relate. i’m the same exact way! GOOD WORK, tho!

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