Latrophobia

I’m not sure if I love or hate the doctors in Korea, but I am becoming a little afraid of them.
 
Today I went to the doctor for two things. First, I have insomnia again. To a ridiculous degree. Again. For those who know me well – I’m a bad sleeper. Always have been. But there are periods in my life where it is severe. Like right now. And I can’t afford to be this exhausted with everything that I’m doing. So I went to the doctor to get help (read: drugs) for that. And secondly, as I have been bragging to everyone, I am going to Cambodia in about a week. Well, when I was in Thailand, I had that weird vertigo-thing happen and it was (according to the MD) because of my extremely low blood pressure. So I wanted to know if I could do something to prevent getting the spins when I go to Cambodia.
 
The insomnia – no problem. "Here’s some pills," he said… and then he suggested that I take them with a glass or two of my favorite red wine each night at bedtime. At this point, I love this doctor.
 
Then he checks and re-checks my blood pressure on my right arm. And then my left. And he’s making a funny face. He says, "It is very low."  Yah, yah, yah. I KNOW! Even in Canada my doctor told me that – no. big. deal.  Then he listened to my heart and made an even funnier face (obviously, NOT ha-ha funny). He then says, "I think you have an irregular heart beat. You need an electrocardiogram."
 
WHA?!?!?
 
Why me? Why again?? Why can’t I just have a damned cold or whatever?? WHY IS IT THAT EVERY TIME I SEE THE DAMNED DOCTOR I’M DYING OF SOMETHING?!?
 
Let’s recap my three most interesting medical experiences in Korea:
 
Symptom:  My back hurts.
Diagnosis: Herniated disks in the lower back.
Treatment: 8 weeks of daily physiotherapy (remember the Coffin of Sand?)
 
Symptom: My hip hurts.
Diagnosis: Fracture and bone growth possibly due to cancer.
Treatment: Well, not treatment per se, but I did have to have a MRI. And it wasn’t cancer, but still fractured, and there is no bloody treatment.
 
Symptom: I don’t want to pass out in Cambodia unless it is alcohol-induced.
Diagnosis: Your heart is broken.
Treatment: …
 
Fortunately, they could do the EKG right in the office. And it’s confirmed: I have an irregular heart beat. Apparently my left aorta is hyper-hypo and it fires prematurely and too often. Jerk-off aorta! Not too big a deal though, apparently. Just my heart not working 100% properly. One of those things in my body I thought should be at 100% but apparently not. Apparently, I just need to know that the irregularity is there. Sigh. Can’t believe that I’m falling apart at such a (relatively) young age.
 
Also fortunately, the "treatment" for the low-blood-pressure-induced-vertigo is to drink plenty of fluids (read: beers) and eat too much salt (read: peanuts with my beers). HOORAY!!!
 
I hope that I won’t have to go to the doctor here again. I’m really scared that next time it will actually, really-real-for-real be serious (read: terminal) and not just a scare. Bleh!
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