Monthly Archives: December 2005

>One more sleep


Even though going to Thailand has been in the works for weeks now, it hasn’t felt real. It is starting to feel real now that I am packing bags and only have one more sleep until I get on the damned plane. And I’m a wee bit nervous. How did I go from never going anywhere to going everywhere?? This is craziness…

Not much has been going on this week except my absolute sickness and working. I even took a day off work, I was that freaking sick. I’m still not better, but I’m still getting on the damned plane. I don’t know how bad I would have to be before I would miss this trip… flesh-eating disease. Maybe.

Last week, a package came from my moms (thanks moms!) with many treats in it… I’m so happy about the cinnamon gum I’m giddy. But the best was a present addressed to “Jodi Teacher and her Monkeys… from Santa”. The kids went, well… apeshit. It was hilarious. They kept saying “Jodi Teacher, you writing? You writing, right?” And I kept assuring them that no, no… it wasn’t me. That “Jodi Teacher’s Mommy” said Santa left the present at her house by mistake and she had just sent it along for him. They bought it.


Christmas is fun with a group of people who still believe in all of it. The monkeys have been crazy this week – and every once in a while they break out in “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”, which is sung mostly phonetically.


The present ended up being “magic trees” that we could put together. Fun! The kids had a great time, and I took a bunch of pictures. They are at Flickr, if you want to see happy monkeys. I also took pictures of my PK (afternoon) kids. They can be cute sometimes too. I have to give them all tests tomorrow afternoon and I feel like a Scrooge. Merry fucking Christmas, bastards – write your damned test on the last day before holidays (insert evil laughter here).

So… I won’t be online until after December 31st. I WILL be on the beach with a beverage in one hand and a novel in the other. Aaron promised we can go look at monkeys (real monkeys, not Korean children). I should have lots of pictures (of MONKEYS) when I get back.

In the meantime, Merry Christmas everyone. I hope your holiday is happy, safe, and is spent with people you want to spend time with (I mean, as best you can without me there with you). And because virtual kisses just aren’t the same, consider this my IOU for a big, sloppy, drunken New Years Eve kiss, which you can redeem the next time you see me (no matter when or where that happens to be). Cheers!

Original Comments:

Jeanine wrote (on 27/12/05):
Merry Christmas Jodi!!! Miss ya and hope you have an awesome wicked trip!
Thanks for the card too. A little bit of news for you….Christa and Randy are expecting a baby in Aug 2006 and Brynn and Matt got engaged on her birthday! Lots of changed coming up. Nothing really new in my life. Bought a car last weekend, so I will be working extra hard now! Haha. Talk soon, be safe and drink lots, J

>Warning: Complaint post ahead


So, instead of going out with everyone at work for our Christmas party, I am at home in bed watching movies and nursing a 40 degree fever (that’s 104 degrees to you, moms). This blows. I don’t even feel THAT bad… just achy, cranky, and the blankets are hurting me. And my head hurts. And my throat. And my tummy. 😦

Add insult to injury that I worked all day feeling like crap so I wouldn’t feel guilty about going to the Christmas Party, and now I feel even crappier so I’m not going to the damned Christmas party.


Original Comments:

Erin wrote (on 17/12/05):
Poor Jodi pants!
Fevers suck and I sent all of November catching various flus and colds so I can comiserate!
We miss you and wil have net again on the 28th YAY getting angry does work sometimes.

>Fun times on Hooker Hill


I’m not going to save any money (or my liver) if I keep this shite up. Seriously.


At least I didn’t swear that I wouldn’t go out Friday. Because that would have been a lie. Went to Joe and Orla’s place, had some beers, and headed to the Beer Cabin. It’s a friendly little place with this weird mural of an old dude sitting on a porch of his cabin in the woods (in his socks), holding a Cass Beer and miming that he is shooting a gun. A white dude. I DON’T KNOW WHY. But it was fun, with a lot of good conversation and a whole load of beers. All-in-all, a good night. Most excitedly, we found out on Friday night that there is a Subway coming a block away from the school. WHOOHOO!


Orla, this one is for you, as per Merriam-Webster:

One entry found for bestiality.

Main Entry: bes·ti·al·i·ty
Pronunciation: "bes-chE-'a-l&-tE, "besh-, "bEs-, "bEsh-
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -ties
1 : the condition or status of a lower animal
2 : display or gratification of bestial traits or impulses
3 : sexual relations between a human being and a lower animal



Headed into Seoul in the AM (but not TOO AM, if you get what I mean) to do some shopping and endure some self-inflicted pain with Andy. We went to the Coex first to have a bikini wax done. Although I have had this done many times in Canada, I was nervous about having it done in Korea, as Koreans in general don’t have much hair. So what the hell do they know about removing it?? It wasn’t really any better or worse. It’s a beautiful, universal fact: having hairs ripped out by the root from your pubic area is god-damned uncomfortable no matter where in the world you might dwell. Ouch!

After that, we headed over to the Technomart (didn’t I say it was dangerous that I was brought there in the first place?!? Didn’t I?) so I could get my Nano. And wouldn’t you know… the 4GB black ones were all sold out! Fuckerpants! Looks like Colin will get his before me. But, you know what a trooper I am… I ordered mine online to be shipped to my moms. Who can send it to me. Hooray! This way I could have them engrave “i caught you a delicious bass” on the back for free. If you don’t know what that refers to, you probably didn’t watch the funniest movie to come out in years enough times. Go watch it again.

In order to make up for not spending too much on an Apple product, I bought some more movies and socks. Not Techno-socks, but they are still cool. Then to Itaewon, where we ran into Orla (small country, you know) and went to Hanan Market. Got more dill pickles. Yummy!


Regarding the weather this week: It is fucking cold.


After jaunting home for a quick change of clothes, we headed out for (another) night on the town. Long story made short: the girls and boys were each having their own night out. The boys were supposed to be going… somewhere, but the plan fell through. So, they ended up going to Itaewon, same as the girls. But they weren’t allowed (nor did they want to) come with us. They were probably 2 buses behind us. Crazy. Anyhoo, the girls all went to The Hollywood Grill, had some pitchers, then headed up Hooker Hill.

Yes, moms. Hooker Hill.

Andy kept telling us about a bar up there called “Polly’s Kettle” that was supposed to be good times. After ascertaining that she was, in fact, serious about dragging us up Hooker Hill, we relented and went with (I make it sound like she twisted our arms. We were on our way to drunk already by this point. The conversation probably went like this: “We could go to Polly’s Kettle on Hooker Hill…” “Okay.”) It was just a bar, but we had tons of fun dancing and drinking beers. While we were on our way up, we said that we would have to slaughter the boys if we caught them on Hooker Hill. They showed up in Polly’s Kettle not too long after us. Stupid boys. They didn’t stay as long as we did (they weren’t busy shaking it on the dance floor). After it got super-late, we headed back to Hollywood Grill, drank some more beers. Then ate some chicken skewers and headed home.




Honestly, after Friday and Saturday, what the hell did you think I was going to do Sunday??


Multiple France vs. the bidet

I swear I have permission from Frances to tell the funniest story I have heard in a long time. PERMISSION TO TELL THE WORLD. I’m giggling right now… this is something that doesn’t happen to people you know. Unless you know Frances.

Tonight Frances and I skipped the gym and headed to Lotte Mart. We concurred that our first order of business was to stop and use the toilets. Frances mentioned that the bathrooms there were nice (trust me, not all the bathrooms in Korea are nice, so this is a big deal. Some of them are bad enough that I would rather pee my pants. No, really.) and I asked if she had been to the ones in the new E-Mart. She had.

You need to know that the toilets in the E-Mart are equipped with bidets. Now, I’ve never used one before coming to Korea either, and it was slightly intimidating, because the damned thing is in Korean. But, I gave it a try because… well, there are some things you should try before you die. Having water squirted on my bum in the supermarket bathroom was apparently on my list of things to try. Try to picture the control panel for this bidet: there are about six buttons on this wee box attached to the side of the toilet, and it is all in Korean. Frances didn’t realize that it was a control panel for a bidet. She thought it was how you flushed the toilet.

Before you can start laughing (I am), this gets better. Because Frances was already standing up when she tried the buttons. (Now I really am laughing). She pushed one, and it didn’t seem to do anything. So she pushed another one, and she says “this weird little nozzle poked out from under the rim”. So Frances leaned in closer to see what it was.

Okay, wait a minute… I have to get control of myself.

Okay, I’m okay… nope.

Okay. I’m okay. I can finish this without laughing now…

So of course the damned thing starts spraying water (cold water, she tells me) and Frances panics. She backs up and the water pressure is good enough that it was hitting the stall door. She was crammed into the wrong corner, and got hit again when she had to unlock the door to escape. Then, of course, you now have to picture the toilet spraying water right out of the bathroom stall and hitting the opposite wall.

Oh no… here I go again. I gave myself the giggles.

I’m okay.

Poor Frances! She finally escaped the bidet and had to try and dry herself off using the hand drier. At the supermarket.

Oh Frances: thank you so much for this story! I will treasure it forever…

>Nothing specific going on


But I thought I would write in my blog anyway. It will distract me from the Christmas cards I SHOULD be writing (shudder).

This week went by fairly quickly, although I’m pretty tired tonight for no good reason that I can ascertain. I skipped the gym and pissed around with Christmas music all night. Read another chapter in “Opening Skinner’s Box” (one more to go), played some guitar and now I’m wasting cyber-space with this entry.

This weekend I’m going to go back to the Technomart (why did someone take me there in the first place, I’m a technophile and was bound to go back) to by an iPod Nano. My goal is to get mine before Colin gets his. (ha ha) As long as they aren’t sold out, I may succeed. I’m just looking to be able to carry around more music ’cause I have to ride buses and subways more now than I did before. Also, I think it will make the plane ride to Thailand (whoo hoo!) more enjoyable (no offence, Aaron).

Things are still going well here in Korea. I’m not going crazy yet with homesickness. I mostly miss conversations with friends. And sushi. Oh, and my moms! But right now this feels pretty right, and I’m not sorry at all to be here. It feels like work and a vacation at the same time.

I also thought I should report on the old back… it is fine. I haven’t had any problems since I finished traction and the coffin and sand stint. I think it is helping that I go to the gym almost every day (except today. And weekends. Okay, at least four days a week) and I’m doing a lot of strengthening. When I first started going to the gym, I would be lucky to finish 15 sit-ups in a night. Now I can do 100 (not in a row, mind you). So, I am getting stronger. I’m glad too, because I’ll tell ya: that back shit scared me. I didn’t want to be a crippled old lady before I turned thirty (let us not contemplate how close to thirty I may or may not be at this time). That would have killed any chance of having grand times in Cougerville (a possibility) or MILFton (less of a possibility… I still don’t plan on having any kids), let alone being able to travel and run around doing… stuff. Whatever “stuff” might be. So, I’m happy to say the back is good.

I guess all is good. And nothing weird is happening. Or exciting (except Thailand is coming up). So, that is why no blogging. And now: Useless Blog. Sorry ’bout that. Just thought I would let you know that I’m still alright.

Original Comments:

Janikl wrote (on 08/12/05):
One of my friends just arrived from Thailand, and she said it was the most amazing and “different” places on Earth…consider yourself lucky that you`re going there!! I`m kinda jealous, hihi….Enjoy!! –Janik =)
PS. You should go check out the beautiful – phenomenal spot where the movie “Beach” was filmed….

and-errhea wrote (on 10/12/05):
This entry made me miss you even more.

You will rock Thailand’s ass. xo.

I should check the weather report before I start laughin’


Well, so all of you back home can have a chuckle, it snowed here last night! It was very beautiful and a little surreal. I wasn’t expecting snow, so I was busy laughing at the Vancouverites (can’t believe you guys got snow either) and that night… snow. There was even some on the ground today. Crazy! This means I won’t take a bus anywhere until it is gone. Those crazy fuckers drive the buses at 140km on the freeway. I have no desire (today) to be a statistic.

Had a great weekend. On Friday a bunch of us went over to Orla and Joe’s place for some poker – Texas Hold ‘Em style. It was grand… I didn’t actually win, but I stayed in a few of the games right until the end which is better than I thought I would do. I was expecting to do so badly that I brought my Gameboy with me so I wouldn’t get bored. It was also fun because we played with Korean money… the buy-in was 3000 and we played with 100 coins. 3000 won is $3, just so you know. But it was still fun to say “I see your five hundred and raise you a grand.” Don’t think I’ll be saying that in Vegas anytime soon!

On Saturday I was back at Orla and Joe’s for dinner. They seemed to think that they “owed me one” for buying them beans (long story). If there is ever a “Best Host” contest, I’m voting for Orla and Joe. They always have food and booze and are willing to have us all over at their place all the time. Hooray! And dinner was very tasty. Much better than the rice and seaweed I was planning on having. While I was there we noticed the snow. It was pretty cool to walk home in it.

Today was super quiet, got my Xmas packages together and cleaned up the joint. Can’t believe how messy such a tiny place can be! I was glad to have a down-time day, I feel more ready to take on the monkeys tomorrow. Only a few more weeks until Thailand!