>Pottery Farm

>I finally uploaded the pottery farm field trip pics to Flickr for everyone to see. FINALLY. Sorry about that. It was a lot of freaking fun too. Well, some of it was. Some wasn’t. Such is life.

We got four classes to each bus, so approximately 40 kids or so. Not bad. Strapped them in and headed out. It was an hour and a half (egads!) to the pottery farm. They played a video on our bus which kept most of the kids entertained. Well, half of them. Because the half that was sitting at the windows couldn’t see the effing TV screen at the front of the effing bus. I heard “Jodi Teacher, me no look” EIGHT MILLION EFFING TIMES!! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! Well, that is what I would have liked to scream. Instead, what I said was, “You can HEAR it, right? Just listen and sing along.” Because it was a sing-a-long type video. It looked like a knock-off of Sesame Street, right down to a faux-Kermit (he wore glasses and his neck-ruff was yellow instead of that sexy green Kermy has). It also had three singing sperm, each a different colour with flowers stuck to their spermy little heads. Now, I suppose you are going to draw the same conclusion I ultimately did… that they were probably tadpoles seeing as how it was a KID’S video and there was the faux-Kermy. BUT SPERM IS FUNNIER. SINGING SPERM. So work with me, okay?

Guess how happy I was after 1.5 hours of this video, singing children, and choruses of “me no look?” So happy. In fact, the only time I really wanted to be dragged out into an isolated field and have a shot gun held to the back of my head was when this creepy Santa puppet joined the singing sperms and they started in on the Christmas carols. In October. In Korean.

After the first photo-op (aurgh) we had lunch. Check out Flickr to see the sweet-ass lunch they provided. Good thing I could pinch food from the monkeys. There were also bees the size of bats everywhere. It was gross, and it was wrong. WRONG WRONG WRONG. And I couldn’t tell the kids to stop running around screaming because of the bees. Because I was running around screaming because of the bees.

After lunch we carved some pottery, and that part was pretty cool. Even the teachers got to make a vase, so it was all good. Mine kicked ass compared to the kid’s vases. Although I saw Richard Teacher’s vase and that guy made the best one. I should try to pinch it and send it to my moms. That would be cool.

After carving pottery, the kids got to go into the mud pits (again, see Flickr). FUN FUN FUN! There was screaming and mud and… no sarcasm… it was fun. I was nearly as muddy as they were, but it was such a great time and they were so happy. Then they all got into the KidWash and got hosed off. They asked us to roll up their pants, and I still don’t see why… they were grotesquely muddy everywhere. Frances Teacher’s student William was the first to strip. He was not the last, and there were muddy naked children everywhere. It was hilarious.

Once everyone was hosed off and changed into clean clothes we went into a pottery museum. This was hell on earth. I had to try and watch 18 hands and be sure they didn’t touch anything. We went so fast (so they couldn’t get bored and try to touch things) that they didn’t see anything. I felt bad for them. Sort of.

On the way home we had to watch the Faux-Kermy & the Singing Sperm show again. But there were fewer cries of “Teacher, me no look” because most of my monkeys (5/9) went to sleep. Joy! They are almost cute when they are sleeping. Still not ready to pack one up and bring it home though. I think they need to be fed and stuff.

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